Things on my mind:

1. There's exactly 2 months left in this semester.

2. I want out of this school.

3. Wait for my top list in a week.

4. I want to.... experience.

5. I want.... a life changing moment.

Summer sucks...

Solitude and tranquility > physical and temporal excitement.

Going to the theaters every Friday night during Oscar season? Metroing across the quiet outskirts of San Antonio? Getting your first apartment? Better than life itself.

Season of art > Season of rollercoaster parks and beaching.

Fall is art. Summer is for physical activities and extra computer time. It's the proscrastination of life, substituing thinking and doing for utter laziness. Does anyone actually take vacations anymore?

Season of beginnings > Season of waiting.

Everything begins in the fall. If anything, summer stops everything.

Season of expectations > Season for stomaching disappointment.

Yeah, it was a disaster semester last year, the summer didn't really help, although it did put off school and I admittedly was too discouraged to not hope to put off school as long as I can, but hell if that helped. One good thing to come out of this summer is the new 6 week interning job, even at the expense of taking summer classes. (but fuck your average idealistic collegiate attitude)

Living alone > living at home + dorms

So, dorm life? Yeah, I got what its like. Fuck dorms. Oh and screw living at home.




2 and a half more weeks, and I am out of here. I'm over last semester. I'm ready to move on.

Semester update

Overall, an ok semester, still I'm ready to get out of this small college I got railed into this semester because I got screwed over by registration. Doesn't affect me much and I actually think this is a good experience, it's just that I naturally lust over a break or the end of the semester or something and am brought down to knees when introduced a study abroad catalogue or a petroleum engineering catalogue or anything indicating a bright future.

Here's some new thoughts that have progressed as a result of my second semester of college:

- College is life. Who cares how long it takes to graduate. I cared in high school. Don't care a bit now. Whatever it takes.

- Classes are more useless now. Independent study is the way to go. I sleep through lectures and still get As. Anyways, I find books more informative than teachers.

- Procrastination succeeds again. After that theory which I promised to debunk during my first semester of college and succeeded, I have recovered it again. Whatever, long spread out studying is not always helpful. You have to go back and review stuff you forgot. Cramming is for masochist, but masochism is fun. What's ultimately important is you review and understand everything. The only time you can be prompted to study is when you feel the test coming up.

- Consistently looking for opportunities. Studying abroad is something I will do when I graduate. No doubt about it. Right now, I like to imagine that there's somewhere I can go. It'll come. And the petroleum school for the spring of 08 I'm banking I'll get in. Opportunities are what college is about. Right now, all I want to do is change a routine, which explains my desire to leave this college.

- Savor the time. I am not wasting one summer in college. The winter break, of 36 days, where I resulted to doing nothing again, pretty much convinced me that I will take classes this summer. I'm even thinking of taking winter classes next semester, either way, I loathe doing nothing, that was fun in high school, but in college it's not. So I'm thinking 1st semester - classes. 2nd semester - volunteer for the 08 olympics. 3rd semester and on - internship, if not then classes again. I like to get my credits fast.

P.S. TBP talks about his personal life. Alot.

I have chosen my career

Patroleum Engineering!

Now what is that exactly? I have no idea. But it's a study in the field of chemical engineering, where you work almost entirely with oil. I'm not sure how long it takes to finish study in this area, but it is a highly stressful and laborous job (or so I've heard), and sometimes are done in the sun or under not-so-preferential weather conditions. The first few years of this job will not allow you anywhere near home for very long. The job includes travelling to many many different locations, almost surely the middle east since that's where all the oil is. That could be a plus for people who don't get homesick or for people who are antsy and can't stay at one place for a long time. It could be a negative for people who like to settle down with a family and or for people who like to make sure their girlfriends aren't banging any other man. But I don't plan on settling down that fast. I consider myself a very antsy person since I plan to take classes this summer (since I hate staying home doing nothing during the summer), will study abroad the latter semester of 07, and I plan to graduate out of college as soon as I can.

So what's the catch? UTexas's patroleum engineering school is the #1 rated school of its field in the entire United States. It's almost murder to get in. I have a good GPA, but that alone might not suffice and I doubt I'll get in initially. Maybe the semester afterwards. But what's the good part about this job other than the travelling? The cash! 120,000 on average, with around 70,000-90,000 for starters.

I feel like hell

About the good/bad things below, I guess the bottom three things for the bad can be erased seeing as they're extraneous, but the top two I hold only minorly to the most damaging thing to my perfection is my unexpected B for a class I rode in all year with an A. Three ways it traumatizes me 1) it's unexpected. It makes you aware that the classes you believe you are doing excellent in could all of a sudden change and your confidence level for next semester drops since you're aware of the possibility of a complete overturn. (that is what happens when you grow overconfident) 2) it kills my perfectionist complex. When you've got an expectation all set, it will kill you when something tells you you're not perfect 3) the knowledge that you could have corrected this.

Starting from this extraordinarily minor grip, I'm diving into the philosophical. I begin to acknowledge that life is a battle of concepts and ideas, you do things to favor your happiness, what you believe to be right; it's a constant effort to seek fulfillment. Materialism can never equate to love, sustenance, or self-satisfaction.

I've watched Armageddon twice in three days, and I totally love the movie, but I can't finish it because I can't stop thinking about this stupid grip and it's late and I feel terrible doing nothing the entire day and uncomfortable that I am still awake. My stupid remote control does not work no matter what batteries I put in and I was set to watch Miami Vice, but the subtitles and special features won't work without the remote, so first thing tomorrow at 3:00 PM (is when I wake up), I shall go buy a new remote control.

Of course, the grade could all just be a computer mistake, but I won't know until I go back to school Jan 15th, but by then I'm already halfway traumautized. I want a vacation already.

Good/Bad things about this semester (Emma style)

Good
- I feel confident that I'm getting a 4.0 average for the first semester
- I feel like a completely different person
- Enjoying the lifestyle in college
- Discovered some new masterpieces
- I found a new home on Oscar Buzz

Bad
-Losing my laptop on my last day on campus
-Texas losing their last two games
-Am not meeting interesting people
-My spirit has not been released yet
-Fucking food on campus is terrible

I shall go home tomorrow.

Going back to school tomorrow

Thanksgiving break is over, partially glad in a way. Finals are coming up, my grades are already too high to be impacted by finals, with the exception of one class. I'm not going back to be stressful, so I'm kind of eager to get back to my films. One week of classes, one week of exams with plenty of in between time, and four relatively blow off exams.

I'm excited over Christmas break since I know I'll be overspending theater tickets and the post season football is guaranteed to be fun. I had such a good first semester.